A Soul Mates Love

One day you will find a love that you didn’t know even existed. You make each other a better person. You grow together, for the better. You will float on air when you see them or hear them. You get so excited to talk to then, even if it’s only been 5 minutes since you last spoke! You wake up happy because you are his or hers and they love you more than anything in this world or the world to come! One look from them and you can see into their very soul. You fall asleep with a smile on your face as you dream of them. They are someone who makes you laugh and laugh so hard that you pee yourself! You can’t be angry with them for more than a minute because things that you usually would be angry about seem not to matter anymore. So instead of being angry, you laugh about it. Nothing about them bugs you, except something silly that really does not matter, like the way they write their signature. But really, who cares about that? You walk together in unison. You give them your heart and your soul and you never ask for it back because you don’t want it back. It’s a precious gift you give. Life starts to feel like a magical dream and you never want to wake up! They understand you like no one else has. You accept the other exactly how they are because to you, they are perfect! You have never been so full of joy and you say, this is a soul mates love!

I said that once. I had the most perfect love with the most perfect man for me. Granted, he had his flaws, but he was so perfect for me in so many ways. He was nothing short of completely amazing! I still am so much in love with this man! I love, adore and admire him! I wake up and say his name. I think of him all day. I fall asleep saying his name. I dream of him all night. Then, the cycle starts all over again…

People who saw us together for even 5 minutes would tell us that we were soul mates. Co-workers, friends, strangers all alike. Whenever we are at a restaurant, the waitresses would make comments too. There was this one waitress that told us that she loved watching us all night long. She said that you could see the love we had for each other and it was so thick that you could cut it with a knife! It was common for people to make such remarks; that you could see our love! I loved it! I was lucky, not only could I see our love; I could feel it so strongly! I love(d) this man more than anything! He is the only one that tore down the wall that I had protecting my heart and really knows the most real and pure me! One look from him and I saw and felt how strongly he loved me!

This, this was real true love! So were we soul mates? I believed we were!

A soul mate is the person you are supposed to and want to spend the rest of your life with!

We never could, or would. Saying “I do” was not an option for us. At the end of the day we wanted too different things from life and we couldn’t come up with a way to make it work. It didn’t help either that I was going out of the country for several months for family reasons. The end is quite sad because he decided he could not, or didn’t want to wait for me to return. In his eyes, I was always planning on leaving and he felt then, that he didn’t matter to me. But he could never have been more wrong! He became a bigger part of me. He came to be my heart and soul. I was crushed beyond the bone when we ‘parted ways’. I felt my heart shatter into dust and saw the dust fly away in the wind. My soul had been ripped out of my very body, possible lost forever. He had felt the same way though. I, without knowing, ripped out his heart and soul long before we ‘parted ways’. The moment I bought my ticket without talking to him first, was when his soul had been ripped.

Despite everything though, we had become one! We were strong! We had such a perfect love! A soul mates love! So now I ask, how can you have a soul mate’s love, and not be meant to be??? =’[