My Dream

I am 23 and not married. When it comes to the 'world' so to speak- that's totally fine. People don't get married that young. But I am a Latter- Day Saint where most women get married between 19-22, so that means I am a little 'old'. Not like that is a bad thing either.
I could have been married in that time frame though. I was engaged from 19-right before my 22nd birthday. But alas it was not meant to be. I broke it off and I am single. I dated someone after and I fell hopeless and crazily in love with that man and I thought he would be my husband. I was so desperate for him to be, and he led me to believe he felt the same. But instead of a ring, I got the worst heart break that I could ever imagine. Now I doubt that I will ever love again. My heart can't bare another heartache like the last one. It was too much pain for me to bare.

God gave us a wonderful gift- our bodies. And you know, its pretty cool!

For example, if you do this... (picture on the left), then try to separate the fingers, you can to all of them- except the ring finger! (picture below)

thumb = friends
pointer = parents
pinky = kids
ring = spouse

One day you will leave your parents.
Ond day your children will move out
Friends always come and go.
But your spouse, will never leave you,
Thats why we wear our wedding bands on our ring finger (possible why it became the ring finger).

Where I am in my life, I can't imagine me being married and having kids. Even though if I had married my ex-fiancé, then we would have been married for a year and a half in a few days, which means that it would be quite possible for me to have a baby in my arms. But we didn't, so I don't.
As much as I can't picture me getting married or having a husband, I still dream of having one. Since I was little I have had this thought of him coming home when I'm am cutting up vegetables in the kitchen preparing for dinner. He comes up behind me and gives me a hug and kiss and tells me that he loves me!
As much as I say that I am a man hater and I don't believe in love. What I really mean, is that one day I want to be in a good healthy relationship and be married to someone that completes me- and I just don't see it happening and I'm sad. But it is my dream!